Uncover Paraty's Hidden Gem: Pousada do Ouro Awaits!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups. This is gonna be less a review, and more like spilling my guts about whatever hotel we’re supposedly talking about. Forget crisp, clean, corporate speak. This is the messy, real-life version. Think of it as therapy… for your eyeballs. Alright, so, Accessibility. Oh boy. This is where things get interesting. The site says 'Facilities for disabled guests'. Okay, great, but what does that mean? Does 'accessible' mean a ramp exists, or does it mean the entire hotel is designed with accessibility as a core value? And believe me, there's a HUGE difference. Did they actually think about the details? Like, are the elevator buttons labeled in Braille? Are the doorways wide enough for a decent-sized chair? I have a story about a hotel once… I'm getting ahead of myself. I really hope the on-site restaurants are accessible. I am always hungry so not being able to grab food is a no-go.
On-site accessible restaurants / lounges, Wheelchair accessible. It has to be. If they're claiming accessibility, they'd freaking better have at least one accessible restaurant! And I'm not talking about a "we think it's accessible" kind of deal. I want to see wide aisles, tables that aren't crammed together, and a damn accessible bar. I hate having to try and squeeze through a crowded bar to get a drink..
Internet access, Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! Internet, Internet [LAN], Internet services, Wi-Fi in public areas. Thank GOD for good internet. First thing I do is check my Wi-Fi to see if it's stable. If I'm spending money to stay somewhere, I expect decent internet. If I can't stream my shows and upload photos of my lunch without buffering, I'm out. Free Wi-Fi in the rooms is basically a requirement in this day and age. I once stayed at a place that charged extra for Wi-Fi. I can't even begin to imagine going back there and paying…
Things to do, ways to relax. Okay, let's talk about the good stuff, shall we? Body scrub, Body wrap, Fitness center, Foot bath, Gym/fitness, Massage, Pool with view, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor].
So, the spa situation. I'm a sucker for a good spa. A real spa, not just a glorified massage room. I want a sauna that'll make me feel like I’ve lost five pounds just by sitting in it. A steam room where I can contemplate the meaning of life in a cloud of glorious humidity. And a pool with a view? Yes, please! The one place I stayed was a bit of a disaster though.
It started promisingly. The spa looked beautiful, all soft lighting and hushed tones. I booked a massage. The masseuse was lovely, but the massage itself? Let's just say it involved a lot of vigorous poking and prodding that leaned a bit too close to medical examination for my liking. And she kept talking! I wanted to relax! Afterwards, I headed to the sauna. The temperature was all over the place. One minute I was baking, the next I was freezing. It was a sauna rollercoaster ride. Finally, I tried the steam room. Utter disaster. It was either bone dry, or gushing with condensation. No middle ground. I eventually gave up and gave up.
Cleanliness and safety. This is huge. BIG. Especially after well, you know… Anti-viral cleaning products, Breakfast in room, Breakfast takeaway service, Cashless payment service, Daily disinfection in common areas, Doctor/nurse on call, First aid kit, Hand sanitizer, Hot water linen and laundry washing, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Shared stationery removed, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment.
I want to see evidence of rigorous cleaning. Anti-viral cleaning products are mandatory. Hygiene certification is a must. And the room sanitization opt-out? Genius. If they’re truly prioritizing safety, they will make sure the staff is trained on safety protocols. And individually-wrapped food options?! I'm all over it! I love having a safe breakfast in my room!
Dining, drinking, and snacking. Hmm. Where to even begin? A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant,
The presence of a good restaurant is crucial! Room service is a must, and 24-hour room service is even better. And hey, let's be honest: nothing cures a travel hangover quite like a greasy breakfast from room service. A bar is necessary. Happy Hour is wonderful.
Breakfast. Buffets can be amazing, or a total nightmare. The last buffet I had featured scrambled eggs that resembled yellow rubber, and a coffee machine that spat out lukewarm brown water. I really hope this breakfast is enjoyable…
Services and conveniences. Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center. This is where a hotel can truly shine. An honest, helpful concierge is a lifesaver. A doorman who actually opens the door with a smile? Wonderful! Contactless check-in/out is a plus. Dry cleaning is a luxury I almost never use.
For the kids. Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal. Listen, I don't have kids and am not the expert here. I just want to make sure families can enjoy their vacations!
Access. CCTV in common areas, CCTV outside property, Check-in/out [express], Check-in/out [private], Couple's room, Exterior corridor, Fire extinguisher, Front desk [24-hour], Hotel chain, Non-smoking rooms, Pets allowed, Proposal spot, Room decorations, Safety/security feature, Security [24-hour], Smoke alarms, Soundproof rooms.
My biggest fear is that I'm going to be walking through the hotel at night and then I experience some type of issue. I hope they have good CCTV.
Available in all rooms. Additional toilet, Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens.
This is crucial. This is the make-or-break stuff. I need a functional AC. Blackout curtains are a must. Hair dryer that actually works?! A rarity, I tell you. The mini bar better be stocked with more than just water! And of course, the Wi-Fi better be free, and strong. And a working window! I need a window that opens! Oh, and complimentary tea. I like tea! And a good reading light, so I can read my book… Here's the thing, the hotel review is subjective, and your experience will vary. But at least I'll be prepared, right?
Uncover Taormina's Hidden Gem: The Ashbee Hotel Awaits!
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're about to dive HEADFIRST into the gloriously messy, sun-kissed chaos that IS a trip to Pousada do Ouro in Paraty, Brazil. This isn't your sanitized, Instagram-perfect itinerary. This is the real damn deal.
Day 1: Arrival, Realization, and the Quest for the Perfect Caipirinha
Morning (ish): ARRIVE. Finally, after what felt like approximately a million layovers (thanks, airline gods!), I'm in Rio. Taxi to Paraty, the scenery turns dreamy, and my brain…well, my brain's still trying to catch up. Breathe. Find the Pousada do Ouro. Whew, it's gorgeous. Like, "wallpaper-worthy-of-my-future-coastal-dream-home" gorgeous.
Afternoon: Check-in complete. Room: charming. Bathroom: surprisingly modern for the antique-y feel. But the real assessment? The balcony view. Holy moly. Suddenly, all the travel exhaustion melts away. It's just… breathtaking. (Okay, okay, maybe that's the sea air talking, and maybe I'm slightly overdramatic.) The important point; it's good. An attempt to leave my baggage and be a tourist, I decided to walk to the beach to see the scene and feel.
Late Afternoon/Early Evening: I am an absolute lunatic. After all the stress of logistics, I made my way down the winding stone streets of Paraty's historic centre (bliss!). It's all so…cute. Seriously. Cobblestone streets, colorful colonial buildings, the smell of something delicious wafting from every corner. And I decide the best first activity should be testing the local flavour: The Caipirinha Quest. This is what I am meant to be. I make my way to a random-looking bar, and order my first caipirinha. It's… decent. Definitely needs work. (I’m a caipirinha snob, apparently.) The quest begins! I'm determined to find the perfect one – the one that’ll make me weep with joy and maybe forget I haven't had a decent meal in roughly a century. My first attempt went badly. But this is not my first rodeo either.
Evening: Dinner at a restaurant I'd been eyeing on TripAdvisor (I know, I know, I'm that tourist). Food: Good, solid. Nothing mind-blowing. The caipirinhas, however, are getting better. I'm three in, feeling tipsy (and slightly smug about my ever-improving cocktail judgment). The night goes down by the riverwalk, walking, talking, and taking photos. I'm still feeling a little shy, still adjusting to new cultures and new people, but feeling more at home after each moment.
Day 2: Boat Trip! Sea Sickness, and a Fishy Surprise
Morning: Boat trip! I booked it! I am ready! Wake up early, grab breakfast (the Pousada's breakfast is top-notch, seriously), and head to the dock with high hopes. But… the sea is not cooperating. The waves are choppy. I'm starting to feel green around the gills (seasick!).
Mid-Day: The boat trip is a mixed bag. The scenery? UNREAL. Crystal-clear turquoise water, lush green islands. Paradise, baby! Snorkeling was cool, I was able to see the world below. The boat staff are lovely. However, the sea sickness is hitting me HARD. I spent a good hour clinging to the railing, praying I didn’t lose my breakfast. I do not want to be that person.
Afternoon: We stop at a beach for lunch, some kind of grilled fish. It looks…intriguing. I’m still feeling queasy, but I force myself to eat. Big mistake. Let's just say I had a conversation with my lunch later that afternoon, and it wasn’t pretty. Vomit city. Apologies to the boat.
Evening: Feeling slightly better, I take a very gentle stroll. I’m still exhausted. I find some gelato (vanilla, just the way I like it). I then write in my journal at the end of the day.
Day 3: The Embrace of History and an Unlikely Friendship
- Morning: Back to the charm! I take a walking tour of Paraty's historic center. The guide is wonderful, a local with a twinkle in her eye and a million stories to tell. I love the history! The colonial architecture, the old churches, the stories of pirates and Portuguese traders… it's all fascinating. And I start to actually relax.
- Mid-Day: A moment. I find a little cafe tucked away on a side street and order a coffee and a pastel (a savory pastry). I sit there, people-watching, and for the first time on the trip, I feel truly, deeply calm. The world slows down. I start to notice details.
- Afternoon: I meet an American girl, just arriving, and also alone. We meet and we strike up a conversation and make our way down the street. And it goes on… and on.. and on. It's just like, 'Okay, come on.' The tour, the museum, the walking. Her presence is perfect.
- Evening: I'm tired still, but I feel good. I eat a meal at my favourite restaurant, and order a caipirinha, taking the memory of the first one I had days before.
Day 4: The Longing for More, and the Final Caipirinha (for Now)
Morning: I take a look at the beauty of where i am. I decide to revisit my favorite places.
Afternoon: I do another walk, remembering where I am, and where I've been.
Late Afternoon/Early Evening: It's my last night. Reality is starting to bite. But I’m also, ironically, starting to feel truly…alive. I find my perfect caipirinha (finally!). It's at a little bar overlooking the harbor. The bartender winks at me as he hands it over. Victory!
Evening: Pack. Stare out the window at the twinkling lights. A little tear. This place, and my time here, has been so much. But I also know I’ll be back. And until then, I have that perfect caipirinha memory with me.
Notes/Ramblings:
- The Food: Okay, so the food wasn't always amazing, but the seafood was generally worth the risk. And the fresh fruit? Divine.
- The People: Brazilians are some of the friendliest, most welcoming people I've ever met. Even when my Portuguese was atrocious (which, let's be honest, was most of the time).
- The Pousada do Ouro: Worth the splurge. Seriously. Book it. You’ll thank me.
- The Weather: Hot! Humid! Prepare for sweat. Accept it.
- The Biggest Lesson: Travel is messy. It's imperfect. It's sometimes uncomfortable. But it's also the most incredible way to expand your world, challenge your assumptions, and maybe, just maybe, find your perfect caipirinha.
Ugh, so, like, what *is* this whole thing anyway? Really, I haven't got a clue. Explain it to me like I'm five. And tired.
Okay, okay, I *think* I get it… but what's the biggest mistake people make when trying to get started? Spill the tea!
Alright, let's say I dive in headfirst. What's the one thing I should *really* focus on first? Don't make me scroll through a thousand tutorials!
I'm already getting confused! What's the hardest part for *you*? Be honest!
So, the opposite of that. What's the best part?? Tell me something to look forward to!
I'm terrified of failing. Like, truly terrified. Any pep talks for a scaredy cat?
What's the best advice you've ever gotten? Like, wisdom, man. Hit me with it.
Alright, hypothetical time. Let's say I hit a wall. Completely and utterly stuck. What do I do NOW? Don't just say "Google it," I already tried that!
- **Break it down.** What *exactly* is the problem? Get specific.
- **Describe it to someone.** Explain it to a rubber ducky, a houseplant... whatever. The act of explaining often helps you see the problem in a new way.
- **Go back to basics.** Re-read the docs. Look at the sample code again. The answer might be staring you in the face.
- **Ask a human (NICELY!).** Post a clear question on a forum... and be *polite*. People are generally helpful, but no one wants to help a jerk.
- **If all else fails:** Take a nap! Sometimes your brain needs a break.
I keep hearing about "debugging." What the heck *is* that? Sounds scary.
What's the most ridiculous thing you've ever seen someone do while trying to do this... thing? Spill the tea!
